This ballad is like a ghost story. After sending her sons out too sea, the wife learned of their deaths. The prayer she prays in the fourth stanza is answered. Her sons came home to her--as ghosts. The supernatural is a common theme in ballads. There are many creepy tales told in the form of the ballad. I think this could be because of the "song quality" of the ballads. Creepy stories like these go along perfectly with a slow, creepy tune. When we read this poem in class, we spoke of the possibility of "The Wife of the Usher's Well" being a sexist poem. "And she has made to them a bed,/ She's made it large and wide,/ and she's ta'en her mantle her about,/ sat down at the bed-side." Does the mention of the woman making the bed make this ballad a sexist poem? Like many of the other ballads in this section, the poem was written by anonymous. It may be either a female or male author. I think it hints at that idea, but from the language used, it seems to have been written quite a while ago. The woman making the bed was probably the norm. Any other ideas about the meaning of this poem? - KGa-c Feb 4, 2008
After having to perform this ballad and basically memorizing it in the process, this poem definitely spoke to me on the depth of the mother's loss. She did her duty as a wife, giving birth to three sons, but all of them are taken from at once. She is moved into utter despair as she says, "I wish the winds may never cease/ nor fashes in the flood/ 'til my three sons come home to me/ in earthly flesh and blood." Her sons answer her call by coming back for the night as ghosts, signified by their hats being of the birk. However, I did not get the impression that the ballad was sexist. What mother would not make her sons a bed after they had come home from the sea, presumed dead? She sits at their bedside so she can just be near them for as long as possible. In many ways, it speaks to the strength of the female spirit in its resilience and its undying love. Certainly she fits the stereotypical role of a mother, but the ballad does not degrade that role in any way. What surprised me most about the ballad is that the last line refers to the lass that kindles their mother's fire. It speaks to the sons' loss of life, their shortness of life and the many experiences that they never had. Still, though, I found it somewhat strange that their last line would be about someone other than their mother. Any other thoughts? - AHa-c Feb 4, 2008
I agree with you, AHa, that this poem is not sexist. I did not get that feeling in any way when I read this. Of course she would want their home to be clean and ready for them, a father would do the same I presume. For me, I didn't get the "ghost" feeling so much as I did a feeling of seeing them in Heaven, because it did mention the, "gates o' Paradise." I think that the poem's tone changed throughout the ballad. In the beginning, the ballad is very depressing. Her sons have just left her, and word has reached her that all three of them have died already. Then, however, I feel almost a sense of relief that they are at peace, especially with the mother knowing this. "Since my three sons are well." This line strikes me; it's at the end of the seventh stanza. The mother is now rejoicing, for she knows that they are with God in Paradise, away from the horrors of this world and they have found their rest. I think although she misses them terribly, she is dealing with her grief toward the end of the poem in a very calm manner. I think for any of us, dealing with a death can be extremely difficult. They say the hardest person to lose is your own child, and I would believe that. As a person strong in my faith, praying for thier welcome into Heaven is better than any kind of help that I could ask for to deal with my own pain. The pain is there, but it is so much easier to let go of that person's earthly absence when their is faith that they are in a better place, they are happier now, because there is no more suffering. This is what I feel the poem is more about, not the fact that there her sons come to visit her as ghosts. More or less, I think the mother received a sense of peace, maybe when her sons came to her in a dream or something letting her know that one day she will see them again in Paradise. - AGe-c Feb 5, 2008
I think that it is important to define what a sexist is before we can call anonymous one. I imagine that this poem was written before the 1920s. Before then, men weren't chauvinists; they were just men. Men did certain jobs while women did other jobs, ideally (of course this was not usually the case). If the boys' mother made their beds and stayed by their bedside because she was a mother, and that is what they did. It's only sexist, to me, if it is meant to keep women down. Anonymous was holding this particular women to the highest level he though imaginible.
Here's the part that I found the most interesting/disturbing. "Gin we be missed out o' our place, A sair pain we maun bide." That suggests one of two possibilities. The boys may not have quite made it to heaven. Perhaps they escaped eternal damnation for one night to spend with their mother. If they are caught out, the devil will make hell more painful for them (turn up the furnace, or something). The other possibility is that heaven isn't exactly the perfect utopia that we though it was. If there can be pain in heaven, again we have two possibilities. Either there is punishment in Heaven (hardly a utopia then), or souls can still sin in Heaven, for which they go to Hell. One would think that a compassionate God would allow three sons to visit their mother without repudiation. Apparently not. And how is that God can't tell if their gone, even if it is dark outside? I would think night vision would come with the whole omnipotent scene, wouldn't you? At any rate, this passage concerned me on any levels. Am I overanalyzing this bit? I would appreciate some feedback.
Could you elaborate on how you could consider that sexist? A woman making a bed? Who makes their bed most often in your house, your mother? For me that's true, and for a good deal of others. ESPECIALLY in that day and age. The poem describes not the woman doing labour, but just sitting by waiting by the bedside. So she's really just waiting as she does her daily chores, and if you think that by describing the chores that she's done, it's automatically sexist, I think you've been greatly misled. The story doesn't focus on any of that at all, it just related the story and some of the emotions of a mother with children who are seamen. And her distress at losing them, a sentiment probably shared with a good number of other mothers in the British Isles at the time. That's the real meaning and focus behind this ballad. - AZU-C Feb 6, 2008
-
After having to perform this ballad and basically memorizing it in the process, this poem definitely spoke to me on the depth of the mother's loss. She did her duty as a wife, giving birth to three sons, but all of them are taken from at once. She is moved into utter despair as she says, "I wish the winds may never cease/ nor fashes in the flood/ 'til my three sons come home to me/ in earthly flesh and blood." Her sons answer her call by coming back for the night as ghosts, signified by their hats being of the birk. However, I did not get the impression that the ballad was sexist. What mother would not make her sons a bed after they had come home from the sea, presumed dead? She sits at their bedside so she can just be near them for as long as possible. In many ways, it speaks to the strength of the female spirit in its resilience and its undying love. Certainly she fits the stereotypical role of a mother, but the ballad does not degrade that role in any way. What surprised me most about the ballad is that the last line refers to the lass that kindles their mother's fire. It speaks to the sons' loss of life, their shortness of life and the many experiences that they never had. Still, though, I found it somewhat strange that their last line would be about someone other than their mother. Any other thoughts? -
I agree with you, AHa, that this poem is not sexist. I did not get that feeling in any way when I read this. Of course she would want their home to be clean and ready for them, a father would do the same I presume. For me, I didn't get the "ghost" feeling so much as I did a feeling of seeing them in Heaven, because it did mention the, "gates o' Paradise." I think that the poem's tone changed throughout the ballad. In the beginning, the ballad is very depressing. Her sons have just left her, and word has reached her that all three of them have died already. Then, however, I feel almost a sense of relief that they are at peace, especially with the mother knowing this. "Since my three sons are well." This line strikes me; it's at the end of the seventh stanza. The mother is now rejoicing, for she knows that they are with God in Paradise, away from the horrors of this world and they have found their rest. I think although she misses them terribly, she is dealing with her grief toward the end of the poem in a very calm manner. I think for any of us, dealing with a death can be extremely difficult. They say the hardest person to lose is your own child, and I would believe that. As a person strong in my faith, praying for thier welcome into Heaven is better than any kind of help that I could ask for to deal with my own pain. The pain is there, but it is so much easier to let go of that person's earthly absence when their is faith that they are in a better place, they are happier now, because there is no more suffering. This is what I feel the poem is more about, not the fact that there her sons come to visit her as ghosts. More or less, I think the mother received a sense of peace, maybe when her sons came to her in a dream or something letting her know that one day she will see them again in Paradise. -
I think that it is important to define what a sexist is before we can call anonymous one. I imagine that this poem was written before the 1920s. Before then, men weren't chauvinists; they were just men. Men did certain jobs while women did other jobs, ideally (of course this was not usually the case). If the boys' mother made their beds and stayed by their bedside because she was a mother, and that is what they did. It's only sexist, to me, if it is meant to keep women down. Anonymous was holding this particular women to the highest level he though imaginible.
Here's the part that I found the most interesting/disturbing. "Gin we be missed out o' our place, A sair pain we maun bide." That suggests one of two possibilities. The boys may not have quite made it to heaven. Perhaps they escaped eternal damnation for one night to spend with their mother. If they are caught out, the devil will make hell more painful for them (turn up the furnace, or something). The other possibility is that heaven isn't exactly the perfect utopia that we though it was. If there can be pain in heaven, again we have two possibilities. Either there is punishment in Heaven (hardly a utopia then), or souls can still sin in Heaven, for which they go to Hell. One would think that a compassionate God would allow three sons to visit their mother without repudiation. Apparently not. And how is that God can't tell if their gone, even if it is dark outside? I would think night vision would come with the whole omnipotent scene, wouldn't you? At any rate, this passage concerned me on any levels. Am I overanalyzing this bit? I would appreciate some feedback.
Could you elaborate on how you could consider that sexist? A woman making a bed? Who makes their bed most often in your house, your mother? For me that's true, and for a good deal of others. ESPECIALLY in that day and age. The poem describes not the woman doing labour, but just sitting by waiting by the bedside. So she's really just waiting as she does her daily chores, and if you think that by describing the chores that she's done, it's automatically sexist, I think you've been greatly misled. The story doesn't focus on any of that at all, it just related the story and some of the emotions of a mother with children who are seamen. And her distress at losing them, a sentiment probably shared with a good number of other mothers in the British Isles at the time. That's the real meaning and focus behind this ballad.
-